Most of us would agree that these aren’t the sexiest of times. In fact, 2020 may go down in the history books as one of the most stressful we’ve encountered to date.
If you are living in a region affected by coronavirus, and thinking of throwing a sex party: don’t. That is, unless you find the idea of your guests trying to hump each other in full hazmat suits sexy. Because, other than that, it would be impossible to prevent an unwitting spread of coronavirus in a large, intimate gathering.
Your risk of infection with the new coronavirus starts as soon as someone gets within six feet of you. While COVID-19 itself is not a sexually transmitted disease, close sexual contact with an asymptomatic partner increases the risk of infection to almost 100 percent.
“Even if you don’t kiss the person you are having sex with, you may still contract coronavirus,” says Dr Muhammad Munir of Lancaster University’s biomedical department. “It’s not just sex itself – it’s any contact involved during the act.”
Safe Sex in the Midst of a Pandemic
Dating in general might be something to sidestep until the epidemic dies down, say the experts. “Dating has a high risk of transmission,” Munir says, “because you tend to have more prolonged contact with the other person.”
These gloomy facts bring us to a question that will undoubtedly have more of a profound influence on post-pandemic human society than you might think. What will our sex lives look like for the foreseeable future?
Taking Matters into Your Own Hands
The New York City (NYC) Department of Health published guidance for residents on safe-sex practices during the COVID-19 outbreak. The fact sheet, written in the bland but mercifully unequivocal language of bureaucracy, begins with an admonition. “New Yorkers should stay home and minimize contact with others to reduce the spread of COVID-19,” the guidelines warn.
The document goes on to assert that the safest way to relieve pent-up urges under lockdown is to slime your own banana, so to speak. “Masturbation will not spread COVID-19, especially if you wash your hands…with soap and water for at least 20 seconds before and after sex,” the document said.
Many have wisely followed that piece of official NYC advice. The fact that several sex toy companies have reported increased sales over the past months should suffice as proof. In July, the German brand Womanizer said that sales were up by 50 percent, and Lovehoney also reported a surge in demand.
Sex toys aren’t likely to be a method of coronavirus transmission if you have been using them alone. However, if you’ve shared your toys within the past 72 hours, make sure they are appropriately cleaned. Wash your hands afterward as the virus may stay active of some surfaces for up to three days
A Shifting World of Fantasies
Interestingly, with an increase in the sales of sex toys, experts have noted a shift in the way people fantasize. If you’ve noticed that the backdrop to your raunchy reveries have come to resemble outdoor adventure brochures lately, you’re not alone. (You can probably thank all the outdoor work meetings for that.)
“For some, fantasies are an escape from reality, and a chance to forget about what’s going on in the world,” says Dr Justin Lehmiller, a research fellow at the Kinsey Institute. “This situation is stressful and unique, and we can’t necessarily meet our sexual and emotional needs in the ways we could in the past, and so people are turning inwards.”
New research indicates that one in 5 people have found their fantasies have changed through lockdown, and more people are also choosing to share these fantasies with their sexual partners. Apparently, the pandemic has taught us the value of candor and honesty.
Staying Faithful to Your Significant Other
You don’t have as much of a problem if you are in a monogamous, committed relationship, and are quarantined with someone you love. Provided you are both healthy and following the recommendations of the World Health Organization (WHO) for hygiene and social distancing, your risk of infection should be manageable.
The international agency currently estimates the risk of household transmission at 3 to 10 percent, but this is based on preliminary data.
The idea of limiting sexual contact to your partner – and social distancing in general – is about ending the chain of transmission.
Should one of you get sick, then you should avoid sex altogether. Sleep in separate bedrooms, designate one bathroom for the sick, and try to stay six feet apart at all times. Be fastidious about cleaning surfaces.
Barring an infection, you can use this time to know each other a little better. For a lot of couples, lockdown has brought about more experimentation.
The Kinsey Institute says 20 percent of couples have made at least one new addition to their sex repertoire. These include sharing fantasies, sexting for the first time, or simply trying new positions.
By the looks of it, it appears that quite a few people have found ways to make boredom and a gnawing sense of impending annihilation wildly stimulating. How about that?
The Wonderful World of Cybersex
A vast multitude of lonely, single, unattached people and cam models have long exploited the internet to expand both their sexual horizons and their incomes. The pandemic has done little to change that. In fact, sex online, in general, seems through the roof right now.
OnlyFans, a website where people subscribe to see pictures and videos they won’t see on Instagram, reported a 75 percent increase in overall new sign-ups. The company reports some 3.7 million new sign-ups in April alone, with 60,000 of them being new models. That should tell you how potent a medium of exchange new technology can be.
If you are single but dating someone long distance, then your only truly safe recourse is through the ether. If you have never tried cybersex, you should. Sexting, FaceTime sex (or Skype or Signal or Google Hangouts) will never match the sticky, moaning, heaving, biting, licking, pinching splendor of face-to-face sex. But – unless you have some lunatic death wish – it’s the only intelligent option you have right now.
That’s not so bad. New technology allows for almost-contact that can be quite satisfying, if not insanely erotic. Remember, though, revenge porn exists because some people simply don’t deserve your trust. Protect yourself and be smart.
It’s All in the Mind
As eerie, lonely, and worrisome as this season has been, the coming months promise even more gloom. Some experts assure us that this year may well be “the hardest and saddest” we will live through as H. Sapiens.
But that doesn’t have to mean an end to all fun. Staying monogamous and growing the relationship you now have is possible. In fact, for many among us, that has always been the goal. Now is the perfect time to achieve that objective.
Even if you aren’t living with your significant other, new technology allows great opportunities to explore fantasies.
You can let loose your inner nasty and be candid about what turns you on. You can submit to your remote partner’s whims or break out some sexy lingerie for a date who’s half-way around the world. Use your imagination. There are countless platforms for you to try out there.
After all, much of what is great about great sex happens in the mind.
What’s you story?
